B-Listers
by purplepelican
Summary: A-Listers weren't the only hunters to make it to Astera. These are some of the wild adventures of the hunters just good enough to make it on the ship to the New World.
1. Jerma Flurgen

B-Listers

Chapter 1 : Jerma Flurgen

The B-List deck smelled awful; drunk hunters kept spilling their drinks on the floor, and all these palicos kept bringing more and more booze. _They also smelled like cats_, Jerma Flurgen thought to himself while mopping some vomit off the floor. He too, like the fine hunters around him, wished he was assigned to the deck below; the A-List deck. At least down there if they got drunk it was cool, fun drunk. Not the sad, desperate kind that was endemic here.

''Flurgen!''

Jerma turned around to see no one before looking down at a palico holding an oversized tray. It was one of the waiters.

''Mess at table fourteen, bring a bucket. Good luck!'' he said before dashing away to deliver his refreshments.

_Table fourteen again? Did she order even MORE lasagna? _A sigh escaped his lips. A janitor's work is never done. He brought his trusty mop and bucket over to the table nearest the big porthole for the third time that night.

Tammy Farcaster indeed had ordered more lasagna. On her table was a bunch of empty cups, plates and a half eaten order of tonight's special : lasagna. It was kind of sad seeing her like this. You'd think being the inventor of the farcaster's daughter would help with making friends, but all she did was get drunk and cry at her table all alone. Every. Single. Night.

''JERMA I'M SORRY _BLURRGGHHH _I THINK I'M SEASICK'' Tammy puked her dinner onto the floor.

''Well, if you keep getting _seasick_ maybe you should... oh I don't know... maybe _slow down _on the _drinking_ a bit, hmm?'' Jerma said, preparing to mop the floor. It's been around four months and all the poor girl's done is drink her butt off. And she's made messes so consistently they literally know each other on a first name basis. It's a miracle the supplies lasted this long.

''But it helps me Jerma_AAAAUUUrrRGHHH!_'' Jerma badly needed a new pair of shoes.

''...I'm sorryyyy...'' Tammy bowed her head.

''It's alright'' it wasn't alright. Jerma was nearing the end of his patience, but at least this was the last day. Then it's dropping all these losers off at Astera Port, and a quiet return trip home. _Just think of the money. Think about your dog. It's going to be worth it, _he told himself.

'''Jermaaaaa,'' Tammy whined as she pulled on his shirt trying to get his attention.

''No more lasagna tonight, okay Tammy? For me?''

''But Jermaaaa,''

''No, Tammy! You're not even _eating _it anymore! You're just mashing it into your mouth like some puppet! What is WITH you and lasagna tonight anyway? Is it really THAT GOOD? Do you need to binge eat AND binge drink AT THE SAME TIME?'' Jerma mopped even more intensely. Making a point not to look up at her. He couldn't keep enabling her like this.

''JERMAAAA!'' she whined even louder.

''TAMMY, GODDAMMIT IF YOU'RE GOING TO ASK FOR MORE LASAGNA I'M JUST GOING TO JUMP THE FUCK OUT THIS PORTHOLE RIGHT NOW!''

The ship suddenly jerked back sending everyone flying off balance. The rest of Tammy's doomed lasagna splattered onto Jerma's shoes. They said the waves would get rougher before landfall, but it's as if the boat hit a giant rock or something.

''Look outside Jermaaa-_GULP,_'' Tammy tried to hold in her vomit before failing anyway, ruining Jerma's shoes some more. It's not like there's anything left to save really, he was going to throw them away the second they landed and he could get a new pair. It was then that Jerma finally looked outside. Was that a _volcano? _The A-List Field Team Commander stumbled upstairs

''Everyone! Ready your weapons! Brace yourselves!'' He shouted. But what's his greatsword going to do about the ship hitting some volcano in the middle of nowhere? The ship jerked again before starting to rise. The volcano was _moving?_

''Lets go! We need to get out of here!'' The B-Listers shuffled drunkenly following the Field Team Commander's orders. Everyone but Tammy, that is. She could barely stand, much less escape what was possibly a giant volcano monster trying to eat the ship.

"Jermeow! We need to get to our posts!'' All the staff doubled as sailors aboard this boat. And in time of emergency it was their responsibility to get everyone safe. Abandoning ship early would lead to a dishonorable discharge.

''Yep! I'll see you above deck!'' Jerma lied. As soon as the waiters left he was going to escape on a lifeboat. He wasn't about to get eaten by some wandering hungry volcano.

''WAIT! You're not LEAVING ME HERE TO DIE ARE YOU?'' the heiress started to cry.

''JERMA YOU'RE GOING TO LEAVE ME TO DIE I CANT BELIEVE YOU YOU STUPID PIECE OF SHIURGGHHHH!'' she vomited again. How is there still lasagna inside this creature?

Jerma thought about saving her.

But he chose not to.

The exhausted janitor opened the porthole window and jumped out.

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Author's notes

So I wanted to fill out the story of Monster Hunter World a little bit. I like to imagine how other hunters in the fifth fleet would have an impact on the main quests of the game. I don't really write a lot but I thought I'd share what I had in mind with the world. Please enjoy!


	2. Farcaster

B-Listers

Chapter 2 : Farcaster

The ship was balanced precariously on a jagged piece of the giant volcano. It was a whole mess of rocks and magma. Went up at least a hundred feet. And if you paid attention, you'd notice the ground was shifting. A moving, living, magma creature. This was definitely the kind of monster you could only find in the new world. You'd have to be batshit crazy to think you could kill something like this.

At the moment, Jerma was holding on for dear life. He stuck his fingers on the side of the hull. Not exactly anything amazing to hold onto here, however. The plan was to jump out and shimmy over to a lifeboat and get to safety, but it seems as though he underestimated the threat. This monster thing was huge. Possibly the biggest single thing he's ever seen in his life; the ship wasn't even in the water anymore. But on the other hand from up here, he could see land. Astera.

_Just make it to the lifeboats _he thought to himself as he moved carefully across the side of the beached ship. He could do it as long as he didn't rush it and slip off. He made it about halfway to the lifeboats before he saw some movement in the night sky. _Wait was that a wyvern? What the hell is going on?_ Jerma forced himself to focus. One step at a time. Get in a lifeboat, row to Astera, get new shoes. And above all, do not die. Like most living things, Jerma wished to live. But then a huge chunk of lava and rock came out of nowhere and hit him on the shoulder, causing him to lose his grip. After about three or four seconds of pathetically screaming for help, he fell onto the lava monster.

He was grateful he didn't land on anything sharp. And that the lava didn't just one-shot him. It turned out that lava wasn't as dangerous as he first thought.

Jerma stroked his chin. All hope was not lost. There was at least a little bit of hope. He was sure of it. He hoped. He just needed a way to get across a mile or so of water. He couldn't swim so that's out. The ship was out of the question, not only was it dangling on some perfectly shaped rock formation, the damage was sure to have broken the hull by now. Lifeboats were in the same situation, tied there to the side of the ship. The others onboard who have not fallen would probably drop some lifeboats into the water and dive down after them. He looked over the edge of the rock formation into the ocean and saw nothing; because it was dark. It was the middle of the night, after all. So waiting and jumping after a lifeboat was out too. If only he had a-

''ROT IN HELL JERMA!'' screamed a shrill voice from the sky. It was Tammy. She had used her slinger to hook herself onto a wingdrake. Because of course she had a farcaster. _Of course._

''Hey Tammy! Could you help a brotha out?'' Jerma tried.

Then Tammy thought about saving him.

She chose not to.

''Seeya loser!'' she shouted, raising her middle finger at him. The wingdrake started flying away. Jerma knew she had extras. There's no way Tammy Farcaster only carried_ one_ farcaster.

Fortunately (or unfortunately depending on who you ask), there was a slope up ahead on the route the wingdrake was taking. If Jerma ran fast enough and timed his jump, he could catch her by the ankle if he was lucky. And seeing as there was no way to convince her to help him, he had no other choice to survive.

Now, he was not an exceptional athlete in any sense of the word. He was average in every sport and he didn't even have the chance to work out on the ship. But in desperate times, the pure drive to survive can overcome most obstacles. There is that saying,_ a cornered fox is more dangerous than a jackal, _or something like that. So Jerma ran.

His shoes were not made for running. In fact, they were still filled and covered in heiress vomit. Every step made a squelching sound. Not only that but the smell was horrifying. An uneven mixture of stomach acid, lasagna, and alcohol made it difficult to breathe. But Jerma couldn't smell it at all. His focus was the end of a needle. He felt his heartbeat reverberating throughout his body. Every step had to land exactly on the one path to survival. There was only one chance.

Miraculously, he made it up the slope and got there just in time for the jump. The rocks were loose, and his footing unstable, but the desperate man did it. With one final loud squelch, he jumped and got a hold of her ankle. For once, everything went according to plan. Tammy was pissed.

''What the fuck, Jerma! Let go!'' Tammy shook her leg. She knew the weight was too much for one wingdrake. They would both end up falling if this stupid man wouldn't just let go and die.

''What? You want me to die?''

''You LEFT ME! REMEMBER?''

''And now you have the chance to prove yourself a better person than me! Come on!''

''No! We'll both die!''

''It'll be fine! Look we're flying now, right? These things carry hunters AND their weapons! Just think of me as a greatsword!''

''That's not how it works! There's balance involved, there's –''

Their argument was interrupted by a huge roar. It sounded distant. But it sounded big.

''What was that?'' the janitor asked the hunter.

''You think _I_ know?''

''You're the hunter!''

''Yeah, they totally covered this back in basic training. They had a guy come over and do imitations of all known monster roars_. _Definitely.''

''Oh, so what monster did that roar come from? Was it this _volcano monster_?!''

''_You think I was serious?''_

The wingdrake was struggling. The two of them felt it losing altitude. But Jerma wasn't about to let go, and Tammy couldn't shake him off without falling off herself.

''Can't you just give me a farcaster? I won't let go until you do''

''I only had one of these!''

''You only had _one?''_

''Well you're only allowed to take one each!''

''Why don't _you_ have extra?''

''Why don't you have one at all?!''

''Do I look like I have the materials to make one right now?''

''THEY WERE GIVING THEM OUT ON THE SHIP, STUPID!''

_Oh._

It was at that moment Jerma remembered an exchange he had with his boss.

_''...and it's only after we get the passengers to the lifeboats we are allowed to abandon ship. Otherwise it's a dishonorable discharge for you. I should also mention that if we are near land at the time of the emergency, we have this whole chest full of farcasters we can hand out to people and wingdrakes will come pick us up. It's a great invention isn't it? Make sure to only give one to each passenger. And- wait. Are... are you actually sleeping while standing up?''_

_''Just resting my eyes, sir!''_

There was a pause.

''Whoops'' he said, sheepishly.

''At least things can't get any worse'' continued Jerma.

''Don't SAY THAT! You'll jinx us! You stupid—''

The slinger's rope snapped. Tammy was right, it was designed for one person only. They probably would have made it if they didn't keep swinging back and forth. The two of them crashed back onto the enormous igneous rock creature below.

Then came another, much more deafening roar. But this time much closer. And right behind them. So close in fact, they felt it's breath on the back of their necks. Jerma had heard the stories. It was the reason the research commission had come to the new world in the first place. There were elder dragons that crossed the sea every ten years. And there they were face to face with the most fearsome one of all. The eater of elder dragons.

Nergigante.

_Perfect timing._


	3. Perfect Timing

B-Listers

Chapter 3 : Perfect Timing

''Dude what do you mean there's none left?'' Goren asked Ash. They were sleeping at the time the monster came. Everyone else was up celebrating the last night of the voyage.

''Do you see anything in that chest?'' Ash replied. Gesturing towards the open, empty chest.

''But they were numbered! They said each of us had one!'' Goren was still searching the room. Maybe the farcasters just fell out of the chest during the ruckus. But the whole room was covered in booze and smelled like lasagna for some reason.

''Well yes, however, there are exactly ZERO here.''

''But how is that possible?''

''DOES THAT MATTER RIGHT NOW?'' Ash slammed the chest shut.

''I guess not'' Goren sighed. He took his hunting horn off his back and started to play.

_I really don't need this bagpipe bullshit right now_, Ash the handler thought. _I remember counting those farcasters myself with all the other handlers. And upon seeing the B-List chest was empty, the staff evacuated themselves? But that would mean someone got extra._

There was a huge but distant roar. The ship was tipping over again.

_Okay, lifeboats it is, then._

Luckily, there was an open porthole nearby. One big enough to jump out from. The handler had an idea.

''Come on, Goren! We're going to go out this porthole and shimmy to the lifeboats!'' Ash said. Goren stopped playing and looked outside.

''No way! That's like a three story drop out there!''

''What! Aren't you a hunter? Aren't we the vanguard of the new world?''

''Not if we die!''

''We're _gonna_ die if we don't make a move right now!''

Goren knew Ash was right. They were dead either way.

''Well alright, I'll come climb the side of the ship with you on one condition'' Goren said.

''Anything.''

''I.. erm.. haven't had my first kiss yet''

Ash was stunned.

_We do not have time for this._

Ash the handler kissed Goren on the lips.

''Okay, there. Let's go. If we survive we don't talk about this, ever''. Ash stated in a serious tone after wiping his lips. Goren just nodded. He was over the moon.

''I'm kind of surprised though'' Ash said, helping Goren out the window.

''Why?'' Goren asked from cloud nine.

''I didn't know you were into guys''

Goren slipped.

After about three or four seconds of pathetically screaming for help, he fell onto the lava monster. However, his realization hit him about twice as hard. Since the beginning of this voyage he has had a crush on his handler. Ash. Who was apparently a guy. After all this time.

Landing like a superhero next to him, was Ash. The boy. His first kiss.

''_You're a guy?_''

''Dude what?''

''But you look-''

''There _are_ male handlers you know!'' Ash was as angry as a male nurse.

''...Nevermind'' Goren said.

_I can't believe it. Look at that body! The face! The Ponytail, even! Like is it my fault I thought you were a lady when you just look so feminine? I mean come on! Prettier than all the girls on the damn boat! But where does that leave me? Man this is going to be a hard song to write._

While Goren was staring into space, Ash formulated a plan. As long as they were out of that giant wooden death trap they could figure a way out of this situation. Ash's current plan was to wait. The creature was headed west toward land anyway. And if the giant magma wyvern went underwater again, or if the ship fell off of it, they could swim towards the ship and take one of the lifeboats. It was a risky plan, but it was the best one he could come up with at the moment. Plus, all they had to do was sit tight. The big volcano thing doesn't even notice the ship lodged in its back. As long as nothing unexpected happens, things are going to be okay.

Ash had started explaining this to Goren when something unexpected happened. They heard another roar, much louder than the one earlier. Below the ledge they were standing on, a huge creature had flown in out of nowhere, scaring a wingdrake into dropping two passengers back onto the large rocky creature.

_Ah. Perfect Timing._


	4. Nergigante

B-Listers

Chapter 4 : Nergigante

When people tell stories about monsters and their adventures hunting them, they never mention the smell. Nergigante's breath smelled like rotten eggs and dead animals. Didn't help that this thing never bathed either. Not like you're likely to tell the tale after facing this beast.

But Tammy didn't waste time thinking about the stench. She was just thankful she brought her light bowgun. She was going to load it but Nergigante was rearing up for an attack.

''Move!'' Tammy pushed Jerma out of the way, putting them both out of reach of the elder dragon's body slam.

''We probably can't kill it'' Tammy cocked her bowgun. ''But I can put it to sleep. Just try not to die.''

Jerma couldn't move. She just saved his life. Even after he left her to die on the ship. There could only be one explanation.

Tammy vomited.

_Yup, she's still drunk. Knowing her there's no way she's this brave sober._

Back on the ship, Jerma remembered, Tammy used to steal drinks from the kitchen. It went on for months before the staff even had an inkling it was happening. And in the end she even had someone else take the fall for it.

However, liquid courage was still courage. Tammy shot a round of sleep ammo into the monster's hind leg. She pulled Jerma by the arm.

''DUCK!'' Tammy shoved Jerma to the ground, just barely missing a tail swipe. She fired her gun again, hitting the creature under its chest.

Then out of the sky fell a swarthy man with a hunting horn.

''AAAAAGGH!'' screamed the hunter as his weapon smashed the deadly spikes off of Nergigante's head.

''ASH, WHAT THE HELL!'' he screamed back at the ledge above. But there was nobody there.

''God dammit!'' the man wiped the sweat off his face.

The shell-shock finally faded from Jerma's mind and he quickly realized the situation they found themselves in.

_Think fast. She'll put Nergigante to sleep but then what? How the hell are we getting off this stupid th-_

The ground shifted. Or more accurately, it started to sink. The giant volcano monster was preparing to go back underwater. They were running out of time.

Nergigante let out a huge roar, interrupting everyones train of thought. The monster stood up on its hind legs before zipping up into the sky. _How can this bastard move so fast? _Jerma thought. A split second later, the monster dived back down again, narrowly missing the three hunters. The thing was moving so fast that Tammy couldn't find an opening to fire her sleep ammo at it. The water was touching their toes, and it was quickly rising. Without pausing for a millisecond, Nergigante took another swing at the hunters, all Jerma could do was watch and dodge. Without any weapon, without any training, it was impossible for him to do anything. Helpless, he watched Tammy and the hunting horn user fend off the invincible beast.

Then he saw something move from the corner of his eye. There was a person up on top of the volcano; and she was pushing a boulder. In an instant he saw the plan.

''OVER HERE YOU SACK OF SHIT!'' Jerma shouted. The two hunters looked at him with confused expressions. Nergigante looked at him the way it looked at everything, like it was eyeing its next snack. The monster jumped. And before Jerma could turn around, it smashed into the ground behind him, embedding its spikes into Jerma's legs.

On the ground and unable to move, Jerma felt the beast's saliva drip onto his face. He saw his life flashing before his eyes. His first dog, his first drink, even the time he failed the entrance exam to the fifth fleet. It was all coming together and falling apart in the same moment. If only Jerma would live a little longer, he would change his ways. He'd be a better man. A braver man. Maybe he could still become a monster hunter, if only there was more time. He closed his eyes.

_**THUD**_

Silence. And then a warmth flooded over Jerma's body. He would have mistaken it for the afterlife, too if he didn't open his eyes again. He was pinned under the sleeping elder dragon. The plan had worked, the stranger atop the volcano had pushed the boulder at the right time, affording Tammy an opening to fire the critical round of sleep ammo. The battle is over, for now.

_''You okay down there?''_ echoed a voice from the volcano's peak.

''SSSH! It's sleeping, Ash! Come down!'_' _the hunting horn user shouted back.

_Probably shouldn't be shouting around a sleeping monster, but what do I know._ Jerma thought as he carefully pulled himself out from under the beast.

''All according to plan!'' Jerma said. He tried to stand, but stumbled back down again. His legs were no good.

''Jerma!'' Tammy went and hugged the janitor. She smelled terrible. Sweat and blood had been added to the already awful lasagna-booze mixture, creating an atrocity of a scent. The sum was definitely more than all its parts.

Unable to push her off, Jerma relented. It beat dying, but only by a little bit. He looked at the other hunter. ''So, who are you?''

The muscular hunting horn user stood very still. Gazing into the distance, he looked like the ultimate badass. Only to be ruined by him throwing up.

''Okay, can everyone _please_ stop throwing up.'' Jerma pleaded. Still caught in the hug of death. Did Tammy just pass out?

''Sorry, I can't help it. That was so scary. I'm Goren Pooka, Fifth Fleet B-List.'' He panted, bent over, with his hands on his knees.

''And coming down from the volcano right now is my handler, Ash Lee''

''Like, just the one name? Ashley?''

''No, Ash Lee. Like Lee is her last name. I-I mean his.''

Jerma was confused. But the handler slid down the steep slope and landed next to them.

''Okay, so we don't have a lot of time. First of all, sorry I pushed you, Goren. But anyway, this is the only shot we have, the water is rising and...'' he quickly and succintly explained the details of his plan. Only, Jerma wasn't listening. He was busy trying to comprehend that this feminine person in front of him was indeed a man.

_What. _Is the only word the janitor held in his mind as the cutest boy in the world explained the plan.

''Ok, got it! Let's go'' Tammy slurred her words before jumping on the back of the sleeping Nergigante. Ash carefully stepped onboard the monster and motioned Goren to carry Jerma on his shoulders, which he did.

_Wait, what exactly are we doing? _Thought the wounded man now perched on the broad shoulders of the hunting horn user.

''And whatever you do, _dont touch anything but the spikes._'' Ash added. It suddenly dawned on Jerma what they were doing. But before he could protest, Tammy gently slapped the butt of her gun against the flesh of Nergigante's head, awakening the elder dragon.

_Oh._


	5. Hang in There

B-Listers

Chapter 5 : Hang in There

Situated on one of the finest coasts yet discovered in the New World is the port city of Astera. Here, cradled in a lush green valley under the bright blue morning sky, a commotion stirred. The news spread like wildfire. A trickle of wingdrakes slowly flooded Astera with the newest members of the Research Commission. Down by the gate, the handlers struggled trying to perform a headcount of all the survivors.

But in the admiral's quarters, the officials spoke in whispers.

''Sir, you can't be serious!''

''With all due respect, _captain_, I don't _joke_ about things like this.'' The admiral smashed his fist on the table.

He continued, ''There is a reason we are all here in the right place at the right time. Look at the doctor's calculations. The appearance of _Zorah Magdaros_ proves tha-''

''But an _extinction event_? This isn't some _game!_'' the captain interrupted.

''Do you understand the lives we're putting at risk?'' piped up the third fleet commander.

''We aren't even _sure about_ _where-''_

_SLAM_

Porcelain and silver rattled in the tremors of the admirals fist.

''Need I remind you all of our responsibility_? We are culpable for everything that happens from now on.''_

He looked at The Seeker, who was leaning against the wall with his arms crossed and head down.

Then the intimidating, wild-haired admiral pinched the bridge of his nose.

_What would you do?_

* * *

Jerma woke up with a start. He decided his first thoughts of the day would be about the bad dream he just had last night. _Wow, that was scary, _Jerma thought, as he gratefully rubbed his eyes. For the moment he was blissfully unaware that the nightmare he thought he had had was far from over. A sharp pain emanated from the middle of his palm. He had cut himself on a boney spike. He rubbed his eyes some more. It sure was a bright day.

In front of him was Goren Pooka, the hunting horn user from his dream. Curious. He looked around. To his side, wedged between some wing spikes was the handler Ash Lee, also from his dream. And behind him he saw Tammy screaming for help. She was holding on for dear life to the tail of the Nergigante they were riding. This is when Jerma's morning reverie ended.

''TAMMY!'' he shouted. He saw her move her mouth, but couldn't hear her. The wind was too strong to scream through.

''HANG IN THERE!'' Jerma patted himself on the back. _That was quick thinking_, he thought.

Jerma tried shaking the others awake, but it was no good. At least they were able to hold on somehow despite passing out. It turns out Nergigante can fly much higher than regular wingdrakes, even. But people weren't designed for such rapid ascension into the sky. They did, however, evolve from primates who were excellent climbers. And after some more overthinking about the nature of man and human climbing capabilities, Jerma started making his way towards the unaware Nergigante's tail. He stopped immediately. The sharp pain in his legs reminded him that the creature actually hit him pretty hard the night before.

_I can't do it, _he thought, looking at Tammy.

_This is so dumb. There has to be some other way._

Then Jerma remembered something crucial about monster hunters going to the New World. Each of them had a slinger equipped. A slinger, which also carried a _grappling hook_.

Through the pain, he carefully climbed back towards Nergigante's head. Goren was out cold, nestled in the suprisingly cozy gaps of Nergigante's black spikes. But he did bring his slinger with him. Carefully, Jerma removed the device and put it on his own arm. It was much heaver than expected.

Meanwhile, Tammy was having the time of her life crying and screaming for help. She luckily didn't pass out at all during the Nergigante's incredible ascent. She was, however, stuck to the bony tail of the beast by the thin leather strap of her bowgun. It was a miracle the infamously aggressive Nergigante hadn't noticed. Suddenly, a grappling hook came flying straight at her face, finally knocking her off the monster.

With the reflexes of a sober person, she grabbed the grappling hook and wound it around her wrist. As she she shifted her weight onto the rope, she could see Nergigante's head turn. It was looking right at her. At _them_.

_It finally noticed_ Jerma and Tammy both thought at the same time.

And it was furious.

The Nergigante let out another trademark roar. All the other passengers onboard shot awake and were suddenly made aware of the situation. The elder dragon stalled for a moment before quickly pivoting to a steep downwards angle.

_Oh shit, _thought everybody.

The spiky creature dived down at an impossible speed. It only took a few seconds to fall below cloud level. The air was getting thicker and the Ancient Forest surrounding Astera came into view.

Without exchanging any words, the team coincidentally all came to the same conclusion. They would need to jump at the right time. Low enough to the ground that the foliage could slow their fall but high enough that the monster would have a hard time tracking them.

They could hear the wind get louder as the ground came closer. Luckily the tallest tree in the forest was right under them. In a few more seconds, the moment came. First to jump was Ash, then Goren. Jerma jumped down afterwards, pulling Tammy with him by the slinger cord. They all fell through the leaves and branches of the tall tree and into a clearing just below the jungle canopy.

By some divine providence, all of them made out alive. Tammy and Jerma were stuck in some branches for a while until Tammy cut the slinger cord with her hunter's knife. The Nergigante was nowhere to be seen. They were safe, for now.

''Is everyone okay?'' Ash said as he did some stretches.

''That was wild, huh?'' he continued.

Goren would have replied, but he was busy. The hunter was lying flat on the ground, grateful to be without the fear of imminent death for once.

''At least you all had a nice sleep! I was calling you guys for like a whole fucking hour hanging onto that tail!'' Tammy inspected the strap to her bowgun. It was only slightly banged up. The leather must have belonged to a tough aptonoth.

''I can't feel my legs...'' Jerma said shakily. He was doubled over next to Tammy. Both his legs were broken.

''Don't be a baby!'' Ash pulled out a large jar of green liquid from his bag.

''Here, drink this. All of it.'' he gingerly placed the beverage into Jerma's hands.

It was a viscous liquid with an oily texture; it tasted a little like honey. He could feel his body healing as he drank it. It hurt a little bit, but not nearly as much as keeping both his legs broken. Incredulous, he finished the drink and stood up.

''Mega potion. Never leave home without 'em'' Ash quipped sardonically, taking the empty jar back from Jerma.

_What is even in that stuff? _Jerma looked at the other hunters and sighed. _Nevermind, I won't question it. Let's just get to town._

And so the brave B-Listers made their way towards Astera. Quiet and tired, they could barely appreciate the sight of the exotic lifeforms present in the forest. All conversation would be saved for after they've had a rest and a shower.


	6. The Room

B-Listers

Chapter 6 : The Room

The Astera canteen was abuzz with survivors' tales. Recruits from the doomed ship each shared their own encounter with what the Research Commission started calling Zorah Magdaros. Rumors were already flying about the brave A-Lister's who were the last to arrive. The story was a handler and her partner had to share a wingdrake and only narrowly survived being eaten by an Anjanath and Great Jagras on the way into Astera. Luckily, the Field Team commander dropped the gate and saved them at the last minute. Tammy was not amused.

Her story about the Nergigante was literally unbelievable. Not only was it hard to believe, but Tammy herself wasn't exactly the most trustworthy person either. Her reputation from the voyage had preceded her. Everybody already knew about her alcoholic antics and the way she framed that poor hunter. He had to clean the ship's bathrooms for weeks. And once again, Tammy found herself sitting at the far table of the canteen, head on her hand, friendless.

Goren hadn't had much luck either. Not that people wouldn't believe him, but he didn't have the guts to talk to all these new people in the first place. He was wired with social anxiety and couldn't keep up with the other hunters. Fed up with trying to socialize, he took his veggie platter and sat down next to the only familiar face he could find, Tammy.

The silence was palpable; but the frustrated heiress eventually relented.

'''Hey'' she said, not looking up from the table.

''...Hey'' Goren shifted in his seat a little. Neither side knew the right thing to say.

''So any luck?'' Tammy asked.

''With what?''

''Y'know... getting people to believe your wild story''

''...oh.. uh.. nope.'' Goren stammered.

She looked at him thoughtfully for a second.

''So you're that kind of guy, huh?''

''What kind?''

''Nevermind'' Tammy understood. _He's useless, _she thought.

They sat in silence for a while. Goren continued eating his vegetables while Tammy played with her omelette. Again, neither side knew what to say. They were still in need of a sleep, a shower, and maybe some medical attention. This peaceful quiet lasted until Jerma dragged himself in. He pulled a chair, and sat down next to the guys.

''What happened, champ?'' Tammy prodded. Seeing him miserable somehow lifted her spirits a little.

''….I got fired''

''Fired from what?'' said Goren in between bites of salad.

''Fired from my _job_ obviously.'' Jerma sighed, defeated.

''Well, why ever would that be?'' Tammy took a sip of her tea. She was glad to see that his abandoning her had repercussions.

''Something about safety and regulations.'' he clarified, vaguely.

_You ignore regulation and prioritize your own safety above the passengers just once, and suddenly you're out of a job forever,_ he thought to himself during the awkward lull in conversation that ensued.

''So what are you going to do now?'' Goren, the master of small-talk, broke the silence.

''Beats me.'' Jerma looked longingly at Tammy's untouched lunch. He dared not ask her for it. He _did_ leave her to die on the ship and then almost got her killed trying to save himself after all. Jerma sighed.

''I'm going to go send out some job applications.'' the ex-janitor stood up and excused himself from the table. After a few more minutes of eating quietly, Goren broke the silence once more to Tammy's chagrin.

''So, have you heard from Ash?''

* * *

Ash was in the Cpt. Erling's quarters. After submitting his report that morning, he received a summons from the captain. He would've much rather been taking his lunch break with the other hunters, but orders were orders. He shifted his weight again. It was a panic attack of an office. The small room was on the far side of the ship permanently moored to Astera's pier. Salty, humid air had found its way through the pores of the old world oak paneling. The green carpet below had been worn down a few shades darker save for some of the still bright edges. And in the middle of the room, the captain kept an antique furniture set. There was a captain's chair and table, and two seats for visitors on the opposite side. Each article was expertly crafted. Tiny carvings depicting world history adorned all the furniture in the room. As a result, the furniture came across as fragile and delicate due to the thinned legs as a result of excess carving.

Muted footsteps led to the door squeaking open. A thin, hirsute man stepped into the office.

''Lee, I presume.''

''Yes, sir.'' Ash stood up and saluted.

''At ease.'' Captain Erling sat at his desk. Ash sank back onto the spindly wooden chair.

''So, I've read your report. Incredible stuff. Nergigante? This far out? I can barely believe it.''

The captain searched his pockets.

''Care for a drink?'' He pulled out his trusty flask. It smelled like liquor.

''No thank you, sir.''

''Suit yourself.'' He took a long gulp before continuing.

''This is the report that we've amended for the record'' the captain slid over a folder with some papers Ash had never seen before. It told the story of them all making it back to Astera on a wingdrake each. There were no missing farcasters.

''But sir, I-'' Erling held up a single finger, halting Ash's words in their tracks.

''Lee, '' The captain leaned forward.

''This is not some _corruption _bullshit. This is a matter of _life and death._'' He shot out of his chair. Ash didn't dare move an inch. He started pacing around Ash's humble seat like an impatient revolture.

''What is going on here, sir?'' The question nearly died in Ash's shaking voice. Erling took another swig from his flask before resuming.

''Look, I know how sketchy this seems. I'm intentionally doctoring the public record and making you keep it secret. I'm aware. But-''

Erling stopped pacing and knelt down on one knee to level his eyes with Ash's.

''I need you to _trust_ me.''

* * *

Ash and Erling soon rejoined the others outside. The two hundred or so B-Listers were assembling for their assignments. Unlike A-Listers, B-Listers were only authorized to work in teams. Solo missions were forbidden as they were deemed too dangerous. And due to budget cuts and personnel restraints, each team of four would share one handler and one room. This day, in fact, is a pivotal moment in the average B-List hunter's life. Teams were decided using data from training records, informal anecdotes from the voyage, and even official incident reports. However, there was no science behind it and the officials made no secret of this. People can't ever be completely quantified after all.

Captain Erling, the B-Listers' commanding officer, stood on a pile supply boxes overlooking the assembly.

''B-Listers! Today is the day your fates are decided!'' Captain Erling went on to announce the members of each team. Sometimes after he finished reciting names of a group of four, audible cheers could be heard from somewhere in the crowd. Other times, his announcement of members was met with exasperated sighs and swear words. Nevertheless, the choice was always accepted as it came from a higher ranking officer in the Research Commission. One by one, the names on the list were orated by the captain. He was finishing the last page when he stopped and shot a quick glance at Ash.

''Okay, last group! Handler : Ash Lee''

''Hunters : Tamara Farcaster, Goren Pooka'' The captain paused. Each of the teammates had independently come to the same conclusion. Ash's incident report was to blame.

''..And that's all. There are no more available hunters from the B-List.'' Erling lamented.

''However! It is part of our strategic tradition to have teams of four! And in order to keep our strategy functional some exceptions must be made!'' He cleared his throat.

''First off, according to the old guild charter, it is permissible in times of shortage to assign handlers to hunt alongside other hunters! Therefore, Ash Lee will act as both handler and hunter for this team!''

Ash nearly fainted. Handler duties were going to be stressful enough without the threat of getting eaten alive every mission.

''That leaves one more slot!'' Then, Erling pulled a crumpled paper from his pocket.

''Here is an application from a certain Jerma Flurgen! Inexperienced as a hunter but he's got moxie! Hand-delivered his impressive application to me personally and everything! I trust you all to show him the ropes!'' His public relations smile was interrupted for a millisecond by a piercing glance sent Jerma's way. As if to threaten him for his hubris.

Jerma gulped. He was on his way to deliver another application to the smithy when he heard his name. He was grateful for the job, but he meant to become a janitor for the captain's ship, not a hunter in his...army? Platoon? Squadron? He wasn't even sure what they were.

_I shouldn't have over-embellished. _He thought. Now he was stuck with those three fools from the ship. But it was worth it to him as long as he could keep a job. Jerma would take anything at this point. Even this torture.

''Now that's over with, it's time for room assignments''. An audible sigh was heard from the crowd. Everyone was tired it seemed.

''But in my humble opinion it would be unfair to assign rooms to you all. Some of you are competitive. Maybe you're hoping you're assigned a particular _nice_ room. Maybe you want the _best_ room.''

Erling took stock of the crowd. He was checking to see if anyone was hungry enough to take the bait.

''Let me assure you. There is one room that is better than all the rest.'' The captain smiled.

''Behold!'' he shouted as he pulled the cover from the painting stood behind him.

_When did that get there? _Jerma wondered.

The painting was enormous. At least 15 feet wide and 5 feet tall. It depicted a beautiful seaside room, complete with infinity pool and a harp playing palico. Whispers filled the crowd of curious B-Listers.

''Now, here is how we will decide'' The captain said with a glint in his eye.

''First team to bring me a Rathian egg from the Ancient Forest gets the room.'' The whispers got even louder than before.

''Everyone else gets the regular'' The captain pulled the painting aside to reveal another painting behind it. This time it was of a shabby wooden room with two bunk beds, one chest, and a coffee table.

The whispers turned into a roar. A mixture of enthusiasm and scorn. Half of the teams didn't want to even bother trying.

Erling pulled out a stopwatch and adjusted the dial.

''Time starts...''

The crowd's roar was deafening.

Tammy sank her talons into Jerma's shoulder. Somehow she had found her way through the crowd and gathered her new teammates together. She already had Goren and Ash in tow. Jerma could have sworn he saw fire in her eyes. He sighed. Tammy wanted the nice room.

**_''NOW!''_**


	7. Foolproof

B-Listers

Chapter 7 : Foolproof

High up in the canopy of the Ancient Forest lived an old Rathian. Her once lustrous green scales were dulled to a washed-out olive tone due to the many turf wars and hunts she had survived. Life was harsh for this flying wyvern. But still she would persist. The green dragon had just finished off a Great Jagras and was currently feeding on its remains. Carefully, she used her fire breath to singe its meat before tossing pieces of it into the air and catching it in her mouth. It wasn't all bad being a Rathian. Sure, the forest was a little overpopulated and full of threats to her and her kin, and the constant threat of being _hunted_ like some _monster_ always hung over her head, but it was never anything she couldn't handle. The only exception being the night before, when a random Nergigante appeared out of nowhere and stuck its spikes in her face before just flying away immediately. It took her hours to pluck the needles out. Sometimes she wondered why she even bothered. Maybe one day all the denizens of the forest would learn to be friends. It was the least she could hope for her children.

Suddenly, alarm bells rang in her head. She looked at her half-cooked prey for a few seconds before deciding to leap into the sky. A mother's instinct was never wrong. Her children were in danger. It was time for _murder_.

* * *

''For the last time I don't give a _flying FUCK_ if you're tired! We are _getting that room'' _Tammy screamed back at Jerma. The team of Jerma, Tammy, Goren, and Ash had been running for a while now. They were headed on a straight path into the forest without even a semblance of a plan. The other hunter groups had split off already, each armed with their own strategy. Also, they were armed. Jerma and Ash, being true rookies, hadn't even had the chance to even pick up weapons yet. In addition, not only was Tammy twisting their arms with pure anger, but the rest of them were too tired to protest. As a result, they were already halfway up the giant tree at the center of the forest before they realized the gravity of their predicament.

''Wait, so how are we even going to do this?'' Goren was the first to speak up. The hunting horn user knew all about Rathians, at least from the textbooks. Never had he encountered one up close. Was a hunting horn even a viable weapon to take against a dragon? How did anyone kill anything at all with the glorified musical instrument? The questions ran through Goren's tired, anxious mind like hunters through a forest.

''It's simple, actually.'' Ash pushed up his glasses. He too, had studied flying wyverns in training.

''All we need is to keep the Rathian distracted while one of us carries the egg back home. I volunteer myself to carry the egg, seeing as I am defenseless and unarmed.''

''But... what... about... me?'' Jerma protested in between gasps for air. This was the most cardio he had ever done in a day. All for a stupid reason as well. Like his new teammates, fatigue had made him delirious and unable to stand against the unstoppable will of Tammy Farcaster. He knew her well enough from the long voyage to the New World to know that _she gets what she wants, period. _He once caught the heiress making moonshine while she was banned from drinking alcohol. She had stolen fruity desserts from the kitchen in order to ferment them into booze. And then, she used her homemade brew to pay off the snitches. She lived in a different world.

''You're carrying the second egg!'' Tammy said with utter confidence.

''Second egg? Wouldn't that just make it more likely for her to target us?'' Ash raised a good point.

''Even a Rathian can't be in two places at once! We'll split up; you take Goren, and I'll take Jerma! That way we'll have two eggs just in case one of us fucks up, and each pair will have someone with a weapon for defense! And if it shows up before we split, I'll just use my sleep ammo! It's foolproof!'' Jerma had never seen Tammy so driven and coherent. The room must have been a big deal for her. At least that's what Jerma thought before he saw her drink another sip of her potion. Each of them had already taken max potions back at Astera, she wasn't healing any wounds with that_ drink_.

_This early in the day? Really? It's barely noon._

Jerma would have shaken his head if he wasn't busy running like his life depended on it.

Finally, they made it all the way up the giant tree. It was a rule of thumb that flying wyverns prefer to live at higher altitudes after all, and Rathians were no exception. Out on one of the giant tree's branches was a large sloped clearing with leaves and sticks padded down as if stepped on by some giant monster. A trickle of water leaked from the high end of the slope through a rough lattice of large dead twigs. And ahead of them laid yet another strange assembly. This time of much thinner branches bent in a vaguely circular fashion. It was the Rathian's nest.

''Fucking... finally...'' Jerma put his hands on his knees and breathed heavily.

Tammy took her bowgun out and scanned the surroundings. Judging from the full nest, it appeared as though they were the first team to make it to the nest, much to their surprise.

Wasting no time at all, Ash picked up one of the eggs.

''Whoa these things are _heavy!''_ He said, stumbling back and forth to keep balance.

''Jerma, you gonna be okay?''

''Just...gimme...minute...catch...breath..'' The ex-janitor panted out.

''We don't have time guys, she'll be here any minute! Rathians have a _keen_ sense for this kind of thing!'' Goren had already drawn his hunting horn.

''Is this even worth it? Isn't the shit room okay? How are _we, of all teams _even the first ones here? This makes no sense!'' Goren kept looking back and forth, weapon in hand. He was shaking like a leaf.

''You're asking that _now? _We already made it up here! Just stick to my plan, and we'll be golden you lazy fucks!'' Tammy said as she organized her ammo. She didn't tell the others that she forgot to restock back in Astera. _She was out of sleep ammo._

''But the big lug is right about one thing! We _are running out of time!_ Jerma, pick up the goddamn egg and lets get moving!'' She commanded.

Jerma looked at Ash, who somehow was able to shrug his shoulders while cradling his egg.

_There's no way in hell we're winning this. This is a dumb plan. Goddammit._

''Alright, lets get this over with.'' Gathering up the last vestiges of strength he had left in his body, Jerma lifted the boulder of an egg from the nest. He was supposed to make it back to Astera carrying _this?_

''_Great fucking Jagras _these things weigh a goddamn _ton_ what do Rathians even _eat?'' _Jerma complained.

''It's not like they're born fully grown! I mean look how heavy this thing is! How does this even fit through their egg-hole? What's it called... a _cloaca?_ Like birds, right?''

''Jerma?'' Goren asked.

''Like, you know, a _cloaca! _It's like a single hole in which shit, piss, cum, and eggs all come out! Nature's mistake if you ask me. You should not have shit and babies come from the same hole it's just _gross!_'' Jerma took out more of his stress on the situation. It was Jerma's bad habit. Once he got started it was tough to stop.

''I mean come _on _this is a_ freaking dragon_ we are talking about! Can't they like just be a little more, y'know, _evolved_? They're supposed to be smarter than us, how the hell do they use their asshole, I mean _cloaca,_ to push out these stupid heavy eggs? It isn't even proportional to their bodies! I mean an egg of _this_ size? It's gotta come from like a really, _really, stupid_ _fat fucking-'' _Jerma stopped talking.

He had just put the pieces together. He didn't notice before, but Tammy, Goren, and Ash were all looking over his shoulder with the same face. Then he felt a warm wind blow against his back. The exhausted ex-janitor turned around, with egg still in hand.

''.._R-R-Rathian_...'' Jerma now shared the same expression his teammates were making.

Absolute silence.

And then an earsplitting roar.


	8. Death by a Thousand Cuts

B-Listers

Chapter 8 : Death by a Thousand Cuts

_In the air, the angry dragon hung like an omen of despair; It's piercing gaze striking through the hearts of all who dared to look upon her. Then she saw. Her offspring, cut down before their first breath. The Great Jagras she hunted for the hatchlings earlier in the day was now a waste, a rotting reminder of mankind's insatiable hunger. Usually, it was normal for a lion's share of her eggs to be taken away before they hatch. This was nature's expectation. Hence, evolution's provision of multiple eggs per reproductive cycle. But today was different. Today, those eggs were due to hatch. The Rathian closed her eyes; the sight of her own young aborted on the bark of the tall tree proved too much for her to stomach. Today, there would be retribution._

Jerma Flurgen paused before letting loose a roar of his own.

''_AAAAAAAHHHHH!_'' The girly scream rattled the branches of the tall tree, but also inadvertently served another purpose, shaking his teammates out of shock and into action. The Rathian reared up its head and let loose a ball of fire. Ash dived into Jerma and knocked him into the ground, saving them from the brunt of the blast. And just as the Rathian turned it's head to assess the others' positions, Goren laid a counterattack swing into her cheek. He turned around to face his teammates.

_''Let's get the fuck out of here!''_ he cried. He really was actually crying. Tears were already falling off his cheeks. Behind him, the wyvern was clearly setting up to do a flying tailspin and poison him.

_''We're not leaving without an egg, assholes!'' _Tammy shouted, wiping her mouth and tossing her empty bottle of Jack Daniel's to the ground. There was more than enough time to react and save Goren, but she was busy downing the rest of her breakfast booze to do it. He was knocked to the edge of the clearing. And past the branch's edge, he saw it was a long, long fall to the ground.

Meanwhile, Tammy was looking at something else. At the corner of her blurry vision she saw another team of hunters lighting a fuse. Following the fuse with her eyes, she saw it lead to a barrel of gunpowder. Her eyes widened. The fuse was lit. And then there was a blinding flash.

* * *

The Rathian crashed into the ground, her eyes were caught by the flashpod. Soon after, the barrels exploded, breaking open the makeshift dam the Rathian had constructed to create this clearing in the first place. The water was an unstoppable wave. It swept the wyvern and every one of those B-Listers off the branch. It felt good to outplay someone.

''Told you guys it would work.'' Darwin said, blowing imaginary smoke off the tip of his finger.

''One plan in a hundred is still one percent success rate, man...'' said one of his teammates.

''Hey! Success is still success no matter how hard you make it, shut your tongue!'' Darwin was no good at comebacks. His team shared a sigh.

''Come on, let's get that room'' the teammate smiled. It was time to get this over with.

Luckily, the nest had only one egg left. There was no threat of another team coming to take another egg and lap them back home. As for the other eggs, they just saw the other team fumble two of them. And seeing as they were the first ones here, by virtue of continually drinking dash juice while running like hell through a shortcut in the forest, they were sure no one had come before and taken an egg before their arrival. They just had to hide in the nearby bushes, and use the second team to come as bait so they could take the egg home hassle free. Piece of cake. Darwin picked the egg up and started the long waddle back home.

* * *

After what felt like a full minute of freefall, Jerma and his band of unlikely heroes splatted onto the forest floor. The ground was wet with still water and decay. Thankfully, it was the soft kind. By some miracle, none of them were hurt. But our heroes ignored this feat of physical durability entirely.

''_Godfuckingdammit!_'' Tammy shouted, stirring random birds from the foliage. Everyone winced at the crack of her voice. She was pissed.

''We're going back up that tree and that's _final!_'' She was _royally_ pissed.

''Tammy, there's no way I'm going back up there.'' Jerma insisted.

''And even if we did make it back, there would be no way we'd be the _first_ team to deliver an egg to Erling, it's _impossible_''

_''Your fucking face is impossible!''_

''Tammy, it's not the time for a tantrum.'' Jerma said, apathetically as Goren looked on like a scared child between his fighting parents.

''Let's just go home.''

''_NO!_''

''Well, the rest of us are going!''

''I SAID-'' Tammy's incendiary rebuttal was cut short by a fireball to the face. The Rathian stood over them menacingly.

''_I'm going to kill you and eat your fucking babies!'' _Tammy cocked her bowgun and started burst fire on the Rathian's face. The wyvern was caught off guard and flinched before gathering herself and taking to the skies once more, preparing for an aerial attack.

_''Ash, go get the fucking egg!'' _Tammy said. But Ash wasn't having it.

* * *

_The doctor had Mrs. Lee sit down in the chair opposite his desk. Things like this were best discussed in private._

_''So doctor, please just tell me, my son? Is he-''_

_''Madam,'' the doctor pushed her glasses up. _

_''There is nothing wrong physiologically speaking, however his behavior...'' the doctor paused to gather herself before continuing. She would have to simplify the medical jargon into an explanation the mother could understand. Fortunately, her experience shone in situations like these. She got a balloon from under her desk, one of many props she used to explain complicated medical situations to patients and patients' relatives. It would be a gross oversimplification, but helpful nonetheless._

_''People are like balloons, you can blow them up with stress and strain.'' She blew up the balloon to illustrate._

_''Now, there's a healthy amount of stress. Just enough to keep this balloon in a balloon-like shape. And then there's too much stress, the kind that comes from excessive workload or personal struggles, et cetera'' The doctor carefully blew the balloon up with a little more air._

_''And humans can mitigate this kind of thing. By releasing stress through art, or tantrums, or by any number of ways healthy or unhealthy, the person is allowed to return to a healthy amount of stress. Like how you can let excess air out of overinflated balloons.'' She let some air out of the balloon to demonstrate._

_''Normally, it's only a question of changing one's habits in order to manage stress better. The field of Psychiatry was invented in order to deal with problems like these. However, in the case of your son, I'm afraid he's...'' The doctor paused again. This is why the balloon metaphor was so handy._

_''He's like a balloon that can't let air out. He exhibits no signs of stress whatsoever until...'' The doctor stopped. She tightened her grip on the balloon._

_''Oh doctor, please, there's no need to-'' Mrs. Lee pleaded._

_POP_

_''...Okay, what the fuck?''_

_''I thought it would be like poetic and kind of funny, y'know a lighthearted joke''_

_''You didn't have to pop the balloon, I already understood.''_

_''Well come on, at least it wasn't dull, right?''_

_''Dull? This is my son's mental wellbeing we are discussing.''_

_''Gomenasai.''_

_''What did you just say to me?''_

_''Okay, okay sorry. Bottom line, every once in a while Ash will explode with all the stress he's been storing up and go back to normal.''_

_''That's literally all you had to say.''_

_''I thought it would be more interesting this way.''_

* * *

''Shut up.'' Ash whispered.

_''What did you just say to me?''_ Tammy shouted back.

''I said, _SHUT UP!_'' Ash had the loudest roar that day. In the blink of an eye, he stole the hunters' knives off the backs of Tammy and Goren and leaped onto the Rathian.

Unable to shake Ash off, the Rathian suffered through a blindingly fast combination of slashes and stabs all over her back. She roared, she flew, she spun in the air, but nothing could stop the relentless attack. It was overwhelming. Her legs, her wings, her face, all covered in a thousand new crimson lines drawn by the two dullest knives in the world. Ash cut off the tail, tore holes in the Rathian's wings, and plucked out it's eyes. But since his weapons were designed for harvesting plants and other more peaceful pursuits, the Rathian's death would be a slow painful one. The Rathian tried to let out a fireball, but only embers came. She tried to fly but her wings wouldn't move. She tried to stand but her legs gave way. She was wrong. There would be no retribution today. The once proud flying wyvern slumped down to the ground one last time, dead.

Covered in blood and dragon viscera, Ash the handler stood over his prey victorious. He shot a withering glare at Tammy.

''Don't make me repeat myself.'' And with the sharp clinks of two knives falling, Ash fainted.


	9. Welcome to the New World

B-Listers

Chapter 9 : Welcome to the New World

That night, a single tear would roll down Jerma's face as he read the bulletin board. They didn't get the room. For the foreseeable future the four of them would be living in what was politely termed as _basic quarters._ He could already smell the cold stone floors, dimly lit desks, and beds bent to the shapes of their predecessors backs. He could already hear the winning team celebrating from afar. It was the team of some guy named Darwin and they were throwing a party at their new pad. Even the A-listers were attending. Apparently it was record time for the rookie egg quest. Even the Field Team Leader was impressed. The purpose was to inspire teamwork in the newcomers, but as the commander put, the newcomers inspired Astera instead. The bastards. So Jerma did the only thing he could do. Bite the bullet and check the place out.

Unfortunately, he was right on the money. Torches on the walls barely lit the room. There were two sets of bunk beds, their cushions hard and dusty. In the middle of the already cramped space was a pockmarked wooden table covered with obscene graffiti. And the singular window had a lovely view of the adjacent building, which just so happened to be the luxurious quarters their rivals won. But basic quarters wasn't without it's advantages. For one thing, the space was so small it would be a breeze to clean. And the bunk beds had these tiny little makeshift curtains carefully nailed to their sides. A modest modicum of privacy. Necessity drove invention after all. And in the corner, a chest full of free weapons. Jerma was awestruck. It was a miracle. How they fit the huge armaments in that comparatively tiny chest was beyond his imagination. But while he was pondering the chest's seemingly endless capacity, the musty door slammed open. It was Goren.

''Fuck,'' Goren sighed.

''I know,'' Jerma agreed.

Tammy wasn't going to like this.

* * *

Meanwhile at Darwin's party, Ash and Tammy were already dealing with their misery; by drowning it in booze.

''This stuff is horrible!''

''Hey ifit getsyadrunk it's working fiiiiine.'' Tammy said before breathing in the rest of her tankard. Sure, they were at the house party of their defeat, but at least there was a bar and the drinks were free.

''So whahappen back there Ash? You messedup that rathiann reall goood...''—Tammy's breath reeked of it already. And it's only been fifteen minutes.

''I don't know, I guess I couldn't hold it in.''

''Nonono neeever hold it innn...''

''And I'm really sorry about that! I didn't mean to get so-''

''Naaahhhh it's fine, you're fiiine.''—Tammy suddenly caught the hiccups.

''I mean, you guys carried me all the way back so I'm grateful and-''

''Assshhhhhhh''

''It won't happen again. Sorry. I used to have anger problems and I guess I just-''

''Aaashhh!''—

''What?''

Tammy put her hands on his face and squeezed just a little bit.

''Howw the hell are you cuter than real girlllsss"_-hic-_Put us alll to shaame why don't you!''

Ash blushed.

''Doon't start that_-hic-_shit!''—Tammy lifted her tankard only to find it mostly empty as she shook the remaining few drops into her mouth.

''HEY! CAAAATT!'' She yelled at the calico palico tending the bar. He let out a small meow. One that said, _''Hey, please don't call me that, I have a name you know.''_

''ONE MORE ROUND FOR THE _BABES_, EHH?''—Tammy put her arm around her cute friend and lifted her empty cup to the ceiling.

The bartender was incredulous. He had never in his short life seen a hunter drink so much alcohol in one sitting. Maybe some humans really do drink that much. But then again, maybe he shouldn't encourage her behavior. Her racist slurs were already rubbing him the wrong way. It was all too common to encounter the C word in his line of work but this girl was pushing it. After spending a few moments deciding how he felt about the whole situation, the palico responded with a meow. A meow that said _''Listen, I get that this is a party alright? I've been there, but enough's enough. That's your your last drink. Period.''_

''Kiiiittttyyyy...'' She protested before the bartender interrupted her with another meow. A much shorter, more staccato meow. One that meant _''And fuck outta here with that racist nonsense! What year is it, anyway? You best be silent less you finna catch these paws, bitch!''_

''Uh-oh,'' Ash understood perfectly.

''Comee heere whoooo's a goood kiittyy...'' Unfortunately, Tammy did not.

In an instant Tammy went from trying to pet a cat to fighting for her life. The barkeep leapt over the bar and went straight for her throat. They crashed backwards, breaking her wooden stool. It wasn't As they grappled with each other on the mahogany floor of the luxury suite, a crowd had gathered around them to spectate the fight. Ash tried to stop them, but the party goers were determined to let them have space to play it out. And the chanting had already started.

_''Fight! Fight! Fight!''_

The palico had her in a chokehold. Desperate for air, she rolled them both over, crashing into the buffet table. The aptonoth roast, the exciteshrooms, and even the lobster spilled over both of them in a cacophony of color and flavor. In the corner of the room an unimportant handler dressed in yellow cried out in despair. Tammy, still losing breath, attempted to stand up. It wasn't easy, but with the power of alcohol she found the strength inside herself to get on her feet. Now the problem was getting out of the chokehold. Suddenly she flashed back to basic training.

_''Okay, class, let's talk mounting.''_—_The instructor drew a simple diagram on the chalkboard._

_''Let's say you've mounted a Rathalos and hypothetically he deicdes to fling himself into a cave wall. Do you : A, switch position or B, brace for impact?''_

_''Brace for impact!'' A random student answered._

_''Nope, you're just going to get mashed into the wall!''_

_''Man this stuff is useless! In a real fight you're not going to be thinking about any of this crap!'' Another student piped up._

_''Hey! Trust me, this stuff is handy. One day you're going to be mounted on a monster and you won't have to consciously think about it if I do my job right! You'll have a quick flashback and instinctively know what to do!''_

After Tammy finished her quick flashback, she instinctively knew what to do. She held onto the bartender's paws around her neck as tight as she could. Then she smashed herself backwards into the wall. Or rather, through an antique cabinet and into the wall. After feeling the paws of her opponent slack from her neck, she turned around to look at her handiwork. The bartender lay there mashed into the cabinet between the broken plates and broken shelves, defeated. The palico let out one last meow before passing out. A meow that simply said _''fuck you''._

A moment of silence. Then, cheers and applause. It was the best party Astera's seen in a while. Ash tended to Tammy's wounds while the palicos wheeled the unconscious barkeep away on a cart. Darwin, watching from the second floor, couldn't wipe the smirk off his face.

* * *

''Hey. Hey Jerma.'' Goren whispered from his top bunk. Barely audible over the party music blasting next door.

''Hey. Heyyyyy.''

''What?''

''You sleeping yet?''

''What do _you _think?''

''Ah well, I guess that was dumb. But I can't sleep.''

''I _noticed_,''—Jerma kept his eyes shut. A futile attempt at rest. Should have picked a farther bed, he thought to himself.

''Looks like you can't sleep either,'' Goren said. It was true. It was impossible to sleep like this. What with the hard, crusty beds and the party next door. It sounded like some kind of fight broke out just now too. And after a long pause Jerma finally replied.

''I don't have one.''

''What do you mean you don't have one?''

''I mean I don't have one. I'm just a janitor, man, I'm literally only here because there's nowhere else to go. All the menial jobs are taken! By _cats!_''

''Hey, you can't say that! You know that's—''

''I know, I know I've worked with these bastards before. They think they own the place and now they expect me not to call them _cats_ I mean _look_ at them! What else are they?''

''_Palicos? Maybe?_ I don't like where this is going Jerma, you need to get woke.''

''You are interrupting my bedtime to literally tell me to _get woke_?''

''Well now that you say it, the irony is kind of funny.''

''Irony? You know what's ironic? Our team literally _kills_ the dragon and we get the bunk beds, how's that for irony?'' Jerma said, exhausted after the day's efforts.

''You know, now that you mention it, that _is_ kind of interesting.'' Goren mused.

''Right? Isn't that _harder_ than getting the eggs? Where's our penthouse and champagne?''

''I don't know, it wasn't part of the mission? Maybe? I guess?''

''All the research commission does is _hunt monsters._''—Jerma rolled over to the other side of his bed before continuing.

''Listen, the plan is tomorrow we're going to see if there was a bounty on that Rathian's head, at least we can get paid for that and buy some new matresses! Are these things filled with rocks?''

''For someone trying to go to sleep you sure talk a lot.'' The timid young hunter quipped.

''Yeah but you started it!''

Suddenly there was knocking on the door. The atmosphere turned heavy. Were they too loud? After all, the walls in this building were paper thin. Nevertheless, Jerma stood up from his bottom bunk bed to greet their visitor.

''Captain Erling! Good evening, sir!''

''That's alright, Flurgen, at ease, at ease...'' Erling said, giving the sleepy B-lister a reassuring pat on the back. His hands were a bit heavy and he smelled of something Jerma couldn't put his finger on.

''What brings you here sir? It's really—''

''We're sorry! It was Tammy! She made us do it!'' Goren interrupted before losing balance and slamming himself on the stone floor from his top bunk.

''No, no you're not in trouble. I just wanted to... confirm.. some information. How was the egg quest?''

''We failed,'' Jerma replied, ''That doesn't mean we get fired right?''

''No. Again, to be clear, you are not in trouble.''—Erling walked further into the room and closed the door before sitting down at the cramped table in the middle of the room. He then produced a notebook from his satchel.

''Has your team encountered the Rathian in any way today?'' The Captain spoke in a low voice.

''Yes, sir.''

''Have you engaged it in combat?''

''Yes, sir.'' Jerma replied. This was it, they _were_ going to be rewarded.

''Ah, I see,''—Erling flipped through his notes— ''And according to our observations, the Rathian has not been spotted for several hours now, since the quest. I'm guessing you may have injured it somehow?''

''Yes, sir! We killed it!'' Jerma beamed. Finally, something going their way.

''You are aware you were meant to just bring the eggs home, correct?''

''Yes, sir. I don't understand, what's the prob—''

''You WEREN'T MEANT TO KILL IT!''—Erling pounded the creaky table with a heavy fist.

''It was tagged for research! You can't just go in the Ancient Forest killing whatever living being you find without a direct assignment!_ Do you think this is a game? _Do you _realize _ what you've done?!'' The captain struggled to keep his voice to a shouting whisper as to not awaken the recruits in the adjacent rooms. Jerma started to sweat. They _were_ in trouble after all.

''Sir, we—'' The captain interrupted before Jerma could finish.

''What perplexes me is _why_ you even did it? In all my years I've never seen anyone kill the Rathian during the first egg quest! It's clearly not the correct strategy! No _wonder_ your team failed to secure victory! And furthermore, _how did you even do it? You weren't even issued weapons yet!_''

''_We're sorry! It was Tammy! She made us do it!_'' Goren said, quivering in fear.

Erling sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.

''Okay, listen closely. That Rathian was a very important part of the Ancient Forest ecosystem. Without her...'' The captain paused, as if searching for the right thing to say.

''Have you boys ever heard of the food chain?''

The boys nodded.

''The reason we are here, the reason we have specific assignments is that the food chain here is _incredibly _delicate. Especially with us being here, the entire ecosystem rests on a knife's edge, do you follow?''

The boys nodded again.

''Right, so lets use our imaginations. What happens when we remove an important predator from the ecosystem?''

''Their prey multiplies? To the point of overpopulation?'' Goren gave up the obvious answer.

''Yes, very good. So? In the Ancient Forest what would a big monster like a Rathian like to eat?''

''Smaller monsters?'' Goren replied once again.

''Correct again! Now what do those smaller monsters eat?''

''I don't know...maybe aptonoths? Jagras? Local vegetation? Fish?''

''And what do _we _eat?''

Goren's eyes widened.

''Oh no.''

* * *

Meanwhile, at the luxury suite, Tammy was close to the drunkest she'd ever been. Definitely in the top twenty. She was behind the bar serving everyone their drinks in place of the original palico bartender. And the party was pumping. The fight gave everyone there a huge surge of adrenaline. It was an insane banger of a party. Even Ash was loosening up. He was behind the bar as well, helping Tammy with the more complicated orders.

''Ayo Tammayyy! One more round of Astera's finest beer for me and the homies!''

''Shoore thanng brrothaa!'' The Farcaster heiress slurred as she splashed a half dozen mugs full of draft beer. This was almost the best party ever. Until Ash Lee tapped her on the shoulder.

''Asshshh whazzaaapp?'' She said.

''Tammy, there's someone here wants to talk to you.'' Ash whispered into her ear. It sounded serious.

''Taalk about wha~?''

''It's Darwin, from the winning team! He says that was his palico you beat up!''

''Waiittt, whaa?''

''Just.. just come with me!''—Ash pulled Tammy by the sleeve, leading her outside. On the deck, there he stood.

Darwin was a tall man with beady eyes, as if he needed glasses but never wore them. He was skinny with the exception of a slight beer belly, and he spoke with a very low pitched voice.

''So,'' he said, ''you're the famous _Tammy Farcaster._''

''Yuupp that's meee''

''You beat up Danny.''

''Who's Danny?''

''Danny is my _partner. _The one you so carelessly beat the shit out of.''

''Whhooo?'' Tammy asked. The whole situation was starting to sober her up a little.

''The bartender, Tammy! Danny was the bartender!''

''Yes, Danny was the bartender.'' Darwin confirmed in a chilling tone.

''Not only that, but you've damaged our suite! It's going to cost a _fortune_ to repair all this!'' Darwin said, stifling a smile.

''That heirloom cabinet from the first fleet alone is going to cost a hundred thousand zenny!''

''We don't have that kind of money!'' protested Ash.

''Oh yes you do. Or rather, _Farcaster_ does. Don't you?''

''You ain't getting a single fucking coin you piece of _shit__!_'' Tammy snapped back at him. She was sober enough to form complete thoughts now, and the only thought she had at the moment was kicking Darwin's ass to match his cat's.

''Ah, ah, ah, _Farcaster_.''—Darwin snapped his fingers and his three teammates came out of the shadows like thugs and grabbed Ash and Tammy by the arms.

''Well, if you don't _like_ this arrangement, I could always just bring it up to a higher authority. I'm sure my uncle, the _Research Commission Commander _would be fair on you.''—Tammy and Ash looked at each other in utter disbelief.

''After all it was only _violence and property damage due to racial insensitivity. _You _only _broke my things and hurt my palico, I'm sure the consequences won't be too dire.'' Darwin chided them as he started walking circles around his prey.

''Maybe you were jealous that we won? Taking your frustrations out on your more successful rival? I can see that. Rich girl always gotta get what she wants, right, _Farcaster?_'' Darwin rubbed more salt in the wound.

Darwin leaned in closer. So close in fact that Tammy could smell the lobster.

''Or maybe you were _desperate?_'' Darwin sensed a tiny change in Tammy's expression. Bingo.

''Ooh,_ Farcaster _has a_ secret_!'' he said. He was right on the money and he knew it.

* * *

''Oh yes,'' Captain Erling said, after letting the conversation stew in silence for a few moments.

''We were already facing a food shortage, but now without that predator to keep monster populations down, the only way to keep our supply up is to adjust the ecosystem ourselves.''

''What does that mean?''

''That means more missions, Mr. Flurgen. More missions for everyone.''

''Alright! Isn't that good for the economy though?'' Jerma thought he had it all figured out.

''More missions also means _less pay, _Mr. Flurgen. We don't have the money to do this but the jobs must be done! You know nothing Jerma Flurgen''

It was true, he did know nothing.

''Luckily, we have an amazing group of new fivers this year. There's this one new A-List team that is breaking all the records you should see it! It boggles the mind! But even they can't fix the ecosystem on their own!'' Erling said before another heavy sigh.

''It looks like tough times ahead.''

''Don't worry, sir! If there's any way we can make up for our mistake let us know we'll do it!'' Goren assured Erling.

''Oh, but there is... _one..._ way...'' Erling mused. Jerma suddenly had a bad feeling. The kind that goes up your spine and settles like lead in your stomach at the same time.

''We are running low on fertilizer for our farms. Gathering up some new fertilizer would be amazing and offset the food shortage a little bit.'' The captain said, but Jerma and Goren didn't like where this was going.

''If you boys truly want to make it up to the Research Commission, this is the most direct way to help.''

''Where can we gather fertilizer though? I don't know anything about plants...'' Goren said.

''Monster. Dung.''

''What.'' The teammates said in unison.

''Starting tomorrow.''

''WHAT?'' They said in unison again, but louder this time.

''Starting tomorrow, you'll be gathering all the monster dung you find in the Ancient Forest. It's full of nutrients! Our researchers have a new recipe for what they're calling _Mega Fertilizer. _And it's mostly monster dung.'' Erling said, finally relaxing. He almost had a smile on his face.

''It would be great if your team could gather enough this week to last us this next harvest cycle! Maybe about a few hundred kilograms. Just as much as you can gather! We need _all the fertilizer we can get!_ ''—Erling stood up from the table satisfied. A solution had been found.

''Sir, a hundred kilograms?'' Jerma asked.

''A_ hundred minimum._ Just enough for crops to feed the new fivers!''

''You can't be serious!''

''I mean you could always just_ replace the Rathian you killed!_ Just _find another one and lure it there!_ That's the _alternative!_''

''But that's impossible!''

''Yes. Indeed it is. So this week you're collecting at least a hundred kilos of monster dung for fertilizer!''

Jerma and Goren looked at each other, the light gone from their eyes. So much for the new world.

''Don't worry, you boys will be compensated!''

Perhaps they thought too soon!

''I'll get you a meal voucher for every ten kilograms you bring in!''

Nevermind.

* * *

''Why don't you tell your friend, _Farcaster_?'' Darwin said.

''What's going on, Tammy?''—Ash had no idea at all what Darwin was alluding to. But finally, Tammy broke.

''I'm disowned.'' She said, in a defeated whisper.

''Tammy?''

''Louder for the people in the back, _Tammy!_''

''I've been disowned! There! Happy now, you dick? I can't pay you back! You can choke on it you piece of sh—'' Tammy had her arm twisted by one of Darwin's goons.

''Oh no, you'll still pay it back. I'm going to need hmm let's see...'' Darwin said, thinking to himself a little before choosing his next words. Then, he leaned in

''Alright, One Million Zenny by the end of this week, or I'm telling my dad you're a violent racist and get you kicked out of here, plus I'll tell everyone you're no longer heiress to the Farcaster fortune!''—Darwin's lobster breath wafted all over Tammy's face.

''You can't do that! I have nowhere else to go! Why else am I in the new world?''—In a shocking turn of events, tears started welling up in Tammy's eyes.

''You'll never get away with this you little creep!'' Ash retorted before painfully having her arm twisted a little further as well.

''Hmm, I think I will though.''—Darwin snapped his fingers, and somehow his goons knew exactly what to do. They dragged Tammy and Ash to the edge of the deck where the stairs leading down to the marketplace were.

''Welcome to the New World, _bitch._'' Darwin said as the goons threw Ash and Tammy down the long, long staircase.

* * *

**/**

Authors notes : Yo it's been a while. Fatalis just came out it's hard as heck. If anyone's still reading this I love you also I'm sorry. Btw any suggestions what weapon I should give Jerma?

\- pelican


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